Raising Good Kids in Tough Times:

Drug Abuse: Who's the Model Here?

Dr. Roger McIntire

Despite their eagerness to help, drug companies offer more than short-term solutions. These companies are in the business of developing and selling drugs. So it's in their best interest to sell antidepressants for the glum, tranquilizers for the overactive, and diet pills to anyone who will take them.

Their decisions may not be to our benefit because often these over-prescribed drugs are sold to a wide range of people over a long period. On the other hand, antibiotics and other specific medications are sold for temporary problems. Faced with the choice of researching and advertising medications for temporary problems or medications for a lifetime, drug companies will go where the money is.

Even prescription drugs can be abused in spite of your doctor's refill limitations and dosages. The implied acceptability of such missteps creates a dangerous precedent for a son's or daughter's future excesses.

And it's not enough to complain about drug addicts and then demand prescription programs for anti-depressants and hyperactivity drugs for the kids. How many medication answers can you provide for a child and still maintain an anti-drug attitude?

Children naturally lean toward short-term benefits. Parents have the job of teaching their children to see the long-term consequences.

One mother objected to her doctor's refusal to continue prescribing tranquilizing medication for her son. She said it helped him stay on task, even if he was far beyond the illness that had started the medication. She didn't buy the arguments that he might become dependent, or he might find the distinction between his medicine and street drugs arbitrary.

Of course even child-management medications are necessary in some cases. But be careful with the message that goes along with these remedies. "I can see you're upset, you need your pill," sets a precedent that may be hard to break. Better to keep the comments and the dosages as low as possible.

In addition to medications, set a good example for your child to follow in the use of tobacco and alcohol. Children and teens imitate. Review your own habits for the sake of the kids.

As much as you think your teen will never abuse alcohol or take drugs, you need to know the signs of drug abuse.

1. Unusual, unexplained need for money or money missing from the house.
2. Changes in friends, eating habits or sleeping that don't make sense.
3. Lack of concentration, extreme agitation.
4. "Cold symptoms" that just don't go away - red eyes and persistent sniffles.
5. Changes in appetite, cravings.
6. Changes in fatigue, hyperactivity, appearance, becoming sloppy.
7. Unusual clumsiness, shortness of breath, coughing, peculiar odor to breath or clothes.

Unfortunately, all teens show some of these signs from time to time, and it doesn't indicate drug use. The difference that deserves attention is a cluster of abrupt changes in routine.

Dr. McIntire is the author of Teenagers and Parents: 10 Steps to a Better Relationship and Raising Good Kids in Tough Times. For more information see Parentsuccess.com. For publications, visit the CCBS bookstore.

Dr. Roger McIntire taught child psychology and family counseling at the University of Maryland for 32 years, where he conducted research and did applied work with parents and teachers. He has published several books, for both professionals and parents, appears often on radio and television talk shows, and writes a weekly column, Raising Good Kids in Tough Times, for the Martinsburg (WV) Journal. He received the 2001 Award for Effective Presentation of Behavior Analysis in the Mass Media, from the Association for Behavior Analysis. He is a father and grandfather. You can find out more about his publications at parentsuccess.com.

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